emptychairs.

i get sad at random times. i sob at random times. i could be having a perfectly good day, and start to cry on command. i just got back to my dorm after having dinner with a couple close family friends, i sat down in my chair at my desk, and started to cry. i miss bruce and i miss chris and i miss alot of things that life has selfishly taken from me. im so fucking frustrated with some of my friends lately, it's like all they want to do is find any little thing to bring me down. today i cried for hours.

sleepingtodream

Its 4:59 a.m as i write my first entry in this blog. I'm used to online blogging, ever since i was introduced to the internet. That's when livejournal was cool, everyone had one including myself. I enjoy writing. it's soothing, and it's one of the only things in this world that is mine and only mine. my thoughts, my fingers skipping along the keys of my laptop, my world, my dreams, my imagination running a marathon as usual. I guess you could say my mother inspired me to create a blog of my own. I'd give my mom the world if i could. She's brilliant. I am currently in the FSU library attempting to study for my theatre midterm tomorrow. I can't help but sit here distracted while my mind works against me. My thoughts overpower me and my visions of what my future could be often get in the way of where i am seated right now. That's how it always is for me though, i always crave more.

Fact: I can't stop thinking about Christopher Byrd tonight.
Fact: My birthday was February 15th. I woke up crying, continued to cry all day, and went to bed crying. and i have no idea why.
Fact: Like Sally Owens in the movie Practical Magic states, "i dream of a love that even time will lie down and be still for."